Practice Makes Perfect

Delivering Feedback and Leading Difficult Conversations

By Terence Traut, Entelechy

In our last newsletter, we took a deep dive into coaching in the article, “Think You’re Coaching? Think Again.” We learned that coaching is a performance tool to take good performance to great performance. Coaching is meant for willing and able employees. Coaching can be used to develop a specific skill or to challenge an employee to take their performance to the next level.

The Three Performance Conversations

In this article, we’ll define what we at Entelechy call the Three Performance Conversations (Coaching, Feedback, and Difficult Conversations). We’ll outline scenarios in which each type of conversation is appropriate and we’ll share handy models leaders can reference to feel confident in any performance conversation.

To level-set, let’s start by quickly defining each of the Three Performance Conversations, starting with Coaching.

Coaching Isn’t Always the Answer

Okay, so what if you have an employee who isn’t willing or isn’t able to improve their performance? Or, what if you need to address a particular performance issue, like tardiness or inappropriate behavior? Or, what if you just want to let someone know they’re doing a good job and encourage them to keep it up?

Well, then you need to turn to one of the other two performance conversations: feedback and difficult conversations. First, let’s look at feedback.

Feedback: A Manager’s Best Friend

You’ve heard the old adage: “People don’t leave jobs; they leave bosses.” Well, people leave bosses because they don’t receive consistent and valuable feedback… they don’t know how you think they’re doing. In addition to the impact on the bottom line, here are five reasons why giving feedback effectively is one of the most important management skills in your toolbox:

  1. Employees want it. Most employees want to know how they’re doing — both positive feedback and constructive feedback. So, give it to them!
  2. It’s free. As managers and leaders, much of what we need to provide our employees costs real money. Desks, computers, health insurance, compensation, and so on all cost money. Giving feedback costs nothing in real dollars; while it requires that you invest time to give feedback, it is just that — an INVESTMENT that will reap huge dividends in increased productivity and morale.
  3. It elevates the employees’ perception of you as a leader. As General Tommy Franks states, “You can’t manage’ a troop of soldiers up a hill under fire; you must lead them.” By giving feedback, you put yourself in a role of one who knows and cares. By focusing feedback on the employee’s PERFORMANCE (as opposed to the PERSON), you cement your role as a leader.
  4. It increases performance. With a focus on performance, feedback is instrumental in improving the likelihood that you’ll get more from your employees. Feedback is the difference between an artillery shell and a guided missile. Artillery shells are lobbed in the general direction of the target and much of the success of the shot can be attributed to the planning of the shot. Contrast this with the guided missile whose initial trajectory is far less important than the continual feedback it receives as it hones in on its target.
  5. It is motivational. Most employees want to do a job as effectively and efficiently as possible. With your appropriately worded feedback, you can create an environment in which employees are motivated to perform.

Hold on a second before you rush out to tell your employees “a thing or two” under the guise of feedback. HOW you give feedback is as important (maybe MORE important) as WHAT you say.

Deep Dive: Entelechy’s Feedback Model

Feedback is really nothing more than continually clarifying expectations. Learning how to provide effective feedback ties directly to your desired business results. To deliver effective feedback be sure it is:

  • Useful information that the other person doesn’t have; not judgment
  • Future-focused; not dwelling on past events
  • Solution-oriented
  • Optional

The following model shows how to effectively give employees feedback:

First, provide the employee with the context of your feedback — describe where and when you observed the behavior or performance. Then, be specific in identifying the action that is prompting the feedback — what the person did. Next, describe the effect of the person’s actions on you, the team, the customer, their own career, etc. Lastly, if the feedback is constructive, you will request a different behavior; if the feedback is positive, you will reinforce the current behavior. But, remember to make the request a) future-focused (“To make it even better next time…”), b) optional (“You may want to consider trying…”), and c) solution-oriented (about the performance, not the person).

Effective feedback focuses on performance and results. It is specific, enabling an employee to address a specific developmental need or repeat a specific desirable behavior. Vague feedback such as, “You did a great job on that call,” is not actionable since the employee doesn’t know what specific performance elicited your positive comment. What should the employee do again? What behavior should be repeated? Conversely, what behavior should be stopped? Or, how should it change?

So, what do you do if an employee doesn’t improve their performance after constructive feedback and coaching? Enter the difficult conversation.

Deep Dive: Entelechy’s Difficult Conversation Model

Leading a difficult conversation sounds so simple in theory. Difficult conversations are called difficult because nobody wants them — you don’t want to be there nor does the employee. We know they’re important, but we tend to postpone or avoid them. Why? Because we fear, or are concerned about, how the employee may react. A difficult conversation is necessary in situations where performance or behavior is unacceptable, where constructive feedback has been ineffective in correcting the performance or behavior, and the employee is less willing — or unwilling — to address the issue.

Entelechy’s Difficult Conversation Model is a handy tool for managing performance issues that are more controversial, or that are not effectively addressed through constructive feedback. Issues such as tardiness, continual poor performance, and others are best handled by a direct, objective approach. By using the Difficult Conversation Model to prepare for and then conduct the conversation, you will feel more confident in addressing these thorny issues with employees.

Closing Thoughts

The ultimate role of a leader is to achieve business results through people. While there is a whole universe of skills and techniques that leaders can use to unleash performance, effective and direct performance support via coaching, feedback, and difficult conversations can turn you from a good leader to a great leader. We know that employees crave regular and balanced feedback. And, we know that addressing problem behavior head-on with a difficult conversation can help improve performance and drive change. By mastering the Three Performance Conversations using Entelechy’s simple, prescriptive approach, you will be equipped to engage and inspire employees regardless of the situation. Be the leader; provide feedback, coach, and confidently address performance issues. n

Terence R. Traut is the CEO of Entelechy, a company that develops award-winning leadership development, management, and customer experience training programs for the world’s top organizations. Connect with Terence on LinkedIn or via email at ttraut@unlockit.com.

In our last newsletter, we took a deep dive into coaching in the article, “Think You’re Coaching? Think Again.” We learned that coaching is a performance tool to take good performance to great performance. Coaching is meant for willing and able employees. Coaching can be used to develop a specific skill or to challenge an employee to take their performance to the next level.

The Three Performance Conversations

In this article, we’ll define what we at Entelechy call the Three Performance Conversations (Coaching, Feedback, and Difficult Conversations). We’ll outline scenarios in which each type of conversation is appropriate and we’ll share handy models leaders can reference to feel confident in any performance conversation.

To level-set, let’s start by quickly defining each of the Three Performance Conversations, starting with Coaching.

Coaching Isn’t Always the Answer

Okay, so what if you have an employee who isn’t willing or isn’t able to improve their performance? Or, what if you need to address a particular performance issue, like tardiness or inappropriate behavior? Or, what if you just want to let someone know they’re doing a good job and encourage them to keep it up?

Well, then you need to turn to one of the other two performance conversations: feedback and difficult conversations. First, let’s look at feedback.

Feedback: A Manager’s Best Friend

You’ve heard the old adage: “People don’t leave jobs; they leave bosses.” Well, people leave bosses because they don’t receive consistent and valuable feedback… they don’t know how you think they’re doing. In addition to the impact on the bottom line, here are five reasons why giving feedback effectively is one of the most important management skills in your toolbox:

  1. Employees want it. Most employees want to know how they’re doing — both positive feedback and constructive feedback. So, give it to them!
  2. It’s free. As managers and leaders, much of what we need to provide our employees costs real money. Desks, computers, health insurance, compensation, and so on all cost money. Giving feedback costs nothing in real dollars; while it requires that you invest time to give feedback, it is just that — an INVESTMENT that will reap huge dividends in increased productivity and morale.
  3. It elevates the employees’ perception of you as a leader. As General Tommy Franks states, “You can’t manage’ a troop of soldiers up a hill under fire; you must lead them.” By giving feedback, you put yourself in a role of one who knows and cares. By focusing feedback on the employee’s PERFORMANCE (as opposed to the PERSON), you cement your role as a leader.
  4. It increases performance. With a focus on performance, feedback is instrumental in improving the likelihood that you’ll get more from your employees. Feedback is the difference between an artillery shell and a guided missile. Artillery shells are lobbed in the general direction of the target and much of the success of the shot can be attributed to the planning of the shot. Contrast this with the guided missile whose initial trajectory is far less important than the continual feedback it receives as it hones in on its target.
  5. It is motivational. Most employees want to do a job as effectively and efficiently as possible. With your appropriately worded feedback, you can create an environment in which employees are motivated to perform.

Hold on a second before you rush out to tell your employees “a thing or two” under the guise of feedback. HOW you give feedback is as important (maybe MORE important) as WHAT you say.

Deep Dive: Entelechy’s Feedback Model

Feedback is really nothing more than continually clarifying expectations. Learning how to provide effective feedback ties directly to your desired business results. To deliver effective feedback be sure it is:

  • Useful information that the other person doesn’t have; not judgment
  • Future-focused; not dwelling on past events
  • Solution-oriented
  • Optional

The following model shows how to effectively give employees feedback:

First, provide the employee with the context of your feedback — describe where and when you observed the behavior or performance. Then, be specific in identifying the action that is prompting the feedback — what the person did. Next, describe the effect of the person’s actions on you, the team, the customer, their own career, etc. Lastly, if the feedback is constructive, you will request a different behavior; if the feedback is positive, you will reinforce the current behavior. But, remember to make the request a) future-focused (“To make it even better next time…”), b) optional (“You may want to consider trying…”), and c) solution-oriented (about the performance, not the person).

Effective feedback focuses on performance and results. It is specific, enabling an employee to address a specific developmental need or repeat a specific desirable behavior. Vague feedback such as, “You did a great job on that call,” is not actionable since the employee doesn’t know what specific performance elicited your positive comment. What should the employee do again? What behavior should be repeated? Conversely, what behavior should be stopped? Or, how should it change?

So, what do you do if an employee doesn’t improve their performance after constructive feedback and coaching? Enter the difficult conversation.

Deep Dive: Entelechy’s Difficult Conversation Model

Leading a difficult conversation sounds so simple in theory. Difficult conversations are called difficult because nobody wants them — you don’t want to be there nor does the employee. We know they’re important, but we tend to postpone or avoid them. Why? Because we fear, or are concerned about, how the employee may react. A difficult conversation is necessary in situations where performance or behavior is unacceptable, where constructive feedback has been ineffective in correcting the performance or behavior, and the employee is less willing — or unwilling — to address the issue.

Entelechy’s Difficult Conversation Model is a handy tool for managing performance issues that are more controversial, or that are not effectively addressed through constructive feedback. Issues such as tardiness, continual poor performance, and others are best handled by a direct, objective approach. By using the Difficult Conversation Model to prepare for and then conduct the conversation, you will feel more confident in addressing these thorny issues with employees.

Closing Thoughts

The ultimate role of a leader is to achieve business results through people. While there is a whole universe of skills and techniques that leaders can use to unleash performance, effective and direct performance support via coaching, feedback, and difficult conversations can turn you from a good leader to a great leader. We know that employees crave regular and balanced feedback. And, we know that addressing problem behavior head-on with a difficult conversation can help improve performance and drive change. By mastering the Three Performance Conversations using Entelechy’s simple, prescriptive approach, you will be equipped to engage and inspire employees regardless of the situation. Be the leader; provide feedback, coach, and confidently address performance issues. n

Terence R. Traut is the CEO of Entelechy, a company that develops award-winning leadership development, management, and customer experience training programs for the world’s top organizations. Connect with Terence on LinkedIn or via email at ttraut@unlockit.com.